A Body Amongst the Weeds: a 3 Way Crossover Fanfic
by HistoricalIndie
Summary: A Weeds Crossover with 2 other of my favorites. Takes place immediately following the end of Weeds Season 3 episode 7, where Peter's skeletal remains washed up. PLEASE RATE AND REVIEW


The following is a Weeds fanfiction/crossover story (alternate reality of course) that takes place immediately following the events of Weeds Season 3, episode 7, where Peter's remains washed up in the sewer drain pipe. Disclaimer: Weeds is copyright Showtime Entertaiment and its companies. All properties crossed over are properties of their own respective companies. I don't own any of these characters or places, or obviously, I wouldn't need to write fan fiction. ;)

Chapter 1: Call In The Experts

Nancy Botwin's bare feet softly padded against the floor of her kitchen, iced coffee in hand, as she made her way out back that fateful morning, trying to relax to erase the bizarre events of the previous day from her mind. Things had yet to begin to look up for the plucky, beautiful single mother, little did she know just how much worse they would get first. As she passed the couch, she walked by her son Shane sitting idly on the couch, watching the early news. A breaking news bulletin flashed on the screen just as she passed by.

The announcer on the tv had a bird's eye view of the area around Agrestic behind him, taken from the cockpit of a helicopter: "But our top story tonight concerns a BODY found in the drain pipe at the outskirts of the small suburban community of agrestic California...public work crews found a set of human remains, nearly all decaying bones, washed up somewhere in the vicinity of where we are now looking..."

Nancy pivoted, stopped sipping her drink, and looked at the screen like a deer in the headlights before reaching over to grab the remote from Shane "OK Sweetie! Let's find something ELSE to watch!" She quickly changed the channel to a nature program. Shane looked back at her in frustration "Jesus, Mom, I was watching that!" Nancy walked back into the kitchen and grabbed a handful of aspirin from the cabinet "Yes, well, you shouldn't watch the news so often. Far too much violence for a kid your age...far too much...violence..."

Shane just looked at her, then back to the glow of the TV with a mixture of dumbfoundedness and sheer confusion. "Mom, I live in a house with a notorious marijuana dealer, and you're worried about me being affected by the violence on the news?" He changed the channel back "Hell, you'd think YOU killed him or something!"

Nancy went deathly silent and looked back to the TV, as the announcer continued "The body is speculated to be that of Drug Enforcement Agency special Agent Peter Scottson , who disappeared only days ago in the town of Agrestic. Police have yet to release anymore information, possible speculation or a list of possible suspects."

Shane's eyes were wide like flying saucers "Isn't that that guy you were fucking?"

Nancy ran back over and shut the TV off "Mommy has to make a phone call sweetheart, go up to your room and watch people get hurt on Youtube or something, okay?"

Shane stood up "Please tell me you didn't kill him."

Nancy didn't make eye contact, still staring at the TV like it was on, sitting down in a chair and starting to push buttons on the phone. "Go upstairs sweetie."

Shane ran towards the stairs, walking up them ,then turning around when he reached the halfway point "Marijuana I can handle, but I don't know how I'm going to explain that my mother is a homicidal maniac too."

Nancy ignored him and put the phone up to her ear.

Meanwhile a familiar vehicle was driving down the road towards the golf course community. A frustrated blonde haired woman sat next to a man with neatly trimmed black curly hair, in a tweed jacket and nicely pressed white shirt.

"Mr. Monk, you'll be FINE, this is a very nice suburban community, in the middle of a golf course, it's a very friendly...HIGH end neighborhood..."

"Tell me, again, slowly, what we're even doing here?" Adrian Monk turned to his assistant Natalie as they turned down a sidestreet. Natalie shook her head "The nearest possible major city to Agrestic is San Francisco, Mr. Monk, so Chief Stottlemeyer told their police force, which isn't very big, and apparently rather inefficient, that you'd come down for a private consultation and help them find out what happened to that body that washed up on the shore out there...they are classifying it as a homicide."

Adrian twitched slightly, leaning right as the vehicle turned sharply. "But...there's no crime scene determined yet,..unless of course the man was actually KILLED in the sewer." He stopped, turning to Natalie in sheer panic "Does that mean I have to go in the sewer?"

Natalie stared forward, rolling her eyes slightly "You may have to go in the Sewer."

Monk grabbed both sides of his seat.

Natalie just sighed "Mr. Monk ,I'm going to keep reminding you, this is a highly upperclass community, with VERY RICH clientele, the people here can throw money around...you will be paid VERY WELL for this...I assume."

Monk glared at her as the vehicle pulled up on a stone path next to the waters exiting the sewer system. They looked around in confusion as the police cars and yellow Crime scene tape on the shores were also paired with Vans marked "FBI". As Natalie parked the car, she spoke "FBI?"

Adrian unbuckled his safety belt slowly "They're speculating the body that was found was a federal agent with the DEA, the homicide of a Federal agent is FBI business."

Natalie started to get out of the car, then stopped to look at Monk as he exited the vehicle "Well, remember Mr. Monk, no matter HOW TOUGH these people are, do NOT allow yourself to be intimidated. They might not show you very much respect since they're FBI and you're just a consultant, but I bet you're a MILLION times better than anyone out there, you're smarter than all those people. DO NOT let them intimidate you or push you around."

Monk just nodded "Yes ma'am." Natalie rolled her eyes.

They were immediately met by an FBI agent on their way to the creek bed. "You must be Adrian Monk." He smiled and shook Monk's hand. Monk called out in a loud voice, making himself clear "I'm NOT INTIMIDATED!" The agent looked perplexed but tried to contain his composure as Monk beckoned for a sanitary wipe from Natalie's purse. The agent led them over towards the body "I don't know if you were planning to see FBI crew here at the scene, the fact is we have reason to believe this was a well-respected DEA we found here. One of our consultants in the area confirmed it's a likely scenario based on what we have left here. We still expect you to figure out the exact occurance of events based on the scene, we hear you are quite good at that."

Monk was silent. Natalie answered quickly, looking at Monk and trying to inspire confident reassurance "He's the BEST there is!"

The agent smiled back. Monk stopped as they walked closer to the body. "You said one of the FBI consultants was able to determine you have a likely positive ID on the body." The agent nodded "That's correct.

Monk Continued "I was under the impression all that was left of the deceased was decaying...skeletal remains" He shivered a little.

The agent beckoned Monk and Natalie forward as he explained "Ah, well, you might say she's OUR secret weapon if you will, that's sort of her speciality." The agent walked up beside the body with Monk and Natalie, standing beside it was a young man and woman, the one wearing a suit jacket with an unusually flashy tie, the other in a blue jumpsuit, the only identifying logo a chest patch which read "Jeffersonian Institution". The man extended his hand with a smile "You must be Adrian Monk. I've heard quite a bit about you. I'm Special Agent Seeley Booth. This is my partner, Dr. Temperance Brennan of the Jeffersonian Institute."

End of Chapter 1. Please R&R.


End file.
